The Art of Acnkowledgement
R' Gislason Torah Beis Tinyana Shiur 5
Takeaways:
- The essence of gratitude is paramount, as it cultivates a profound connection to Hashem.
- Experiencing pain should not deter us from expressing thanks; rather, it is a time for acknowledgment.
- A transformative aspect of consciousness arises when we thank Hashem amidst our sufferings and trials.
- True speech reflects inner truth; it is a powerful tool for revealing our authentic selves and intentions.
Transcript
Okay, welcome everybody.
Speaker A:We're back and ready to go.
Speaker A:Sorry for the delay.
Speaker A:And Mitz Hashem will get started.
Speaker A:So today's shear, like for the whole month of Tevas, is sponsored by Sandra Finkelstein.
Speaker A:First of all, in honor of the.
Speaker A:In honor of the anniversary of her parents and in honor of the birthday of her son.
Speaker A:And she had another thing to say.
Speaker A:And when she gets here, we'll bring it up, but Ymir Tz Hashem.
Speaker A:So thank you to Sandra Finkelstein and anyone who's interested in sponsoring Asher.
Speaker A:Please reach out and we can facilitate it.
Speaker A:And we appreciate always everybody's participation in anything we do.
Speaker A:Thank you.
Speaker A:Thank you.
Speaker A:Just like our Torah says.
Speaker A:Thank you.
Speaker A:So we're dealing with Torah Bay's and Tynyana.
Speaker A:The second lesson in the second portion of the Kutemaran.
Speaker A:And we started off, the main idea that we've been speaking about is a whole flow of thankfulness, gratitude that leads to praise, that leads to das, that leads to knowing Hashem, that leads to having a lived emunah dik, strong connection with Hashem, living with constant recognition.
Speaker A:And consciousness of Hashem is really the word we're looking for consciousness of Hashem all the time.
Speaker A:And we understood many things from this.
Speaker A:And one of the other aspects that we saw was that we see that we go through difficult times, and that's a place of what's called tsarah.
Speaker A:And then from within that sorrow, we have a salvation.
Speaker A:We get out of it and we get back to normal and things are great.
Speaker A:And then we thank Hashem.
Speaker A:We say thank you.
Speaker A:That is called when things go back to normal.
Speaker A:That's we call toydah halachah.
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker A:But then we saw there's a better way.
Speaker A:And that is when we.
Speaker A:When we do it in a way that there's a birth.
Speaker A:When a woman gives birth, we said there's something that's very different.
Speaker A:And that thing that's different is that when she's in the middle of the Torah, when she's in the middle of the pain, this is really probably the most important message of this entire Torah, is the message of having.
Speaker A:Having consciousness of Hashem even during our pain.
Speaker A:And from that place of pain, already thanking Hashem.
Speaker A:Thanking Hashem from that place of pain.
Speaker A:Why?
Speaker A:Just because, just like a pregnant woman who's giving birth, how she knows she's in pain and it's not good, doesn't feel good, but she knows that something is being born, something amazing is coming out of it, because she has that das, that knowledge.
Speaker A:She's able to say thank you even in that place.
Speaker A:And so at the very end of this Torah, we didn't get there yet, but we're going to see that the tehillim that's called.
Speaker A:Not called, but Mizmor al Saydah.
Speaker A:Mizmor al Saydah, which is a psalm of thankfulness, that is a segula for a woman to say who's having difficult labor, meaning right in the middle of the.
Speaker A:Of the.
Speaker A:Of the pain, is when you say Mizmulah saeedah, right?
Speaker A:So that's.
Speaker A:That's one of the.
Speaker A:One of the messages.
Speaker A:And so we have.
Speaker A:We have this.
Speaker A:This process of.
Speaker A:Of suffering difficulty.
Speaker A:And from that place, knowing that it's accepting it.
Speaker A:I think another word that's important in this Torah to understand it is acceptance.
Speaker A:Acceptance.
Speaker A:We have acceptance.
Speaker A:We have thanking Hashem from the place of the pain, right?
Speaker A:And we have gratitude.
Speaker A:And they all go together.
Speaker A:And through that process, something is born, something comes out, a new creation, a new connection, a new deeper relationship and understanding of Hashem.
Speaker A:And it always follows this path that we have the step of Tsar recognition, thanking.
Speaker A:And then coming out of that and thanking even more, right?
Speaker A:We saw.
Speaker A:I saw this week learning with Nachman Fried in the Kutaya Alochos that he says it be ferosh, very, very clear that the process is when we're in a difficult place, is first to thank Hashem for the past.
Speaker A:Thank Hashem for the past.
Speaker A:Think about all the times where I was in difficult situations, where things were.
Speaker A:Things were hard.
Speaker A:That's the first toydah.
Speaker A:Remember, we had two words.
Speaker A:And then that'll help me to get into the mind space of seeing Hashem with me now and having a mura that just like Hashem always took care of me.
Speaker A:And all these amazing things I have that happened to me in my past, right?
Speaker A:Hashem's with me now also.
Speaker A:You know, I can thank Hashem here.
Speaker A:And that takes me even to a higher place of Das, where something is born and we have a leda, a birth of Das, of das connection and consciousness, right?
Speaker A:That's the pathway we were on.
Speaker A:So then we said, when we get to.
Speaker A:This is where we went last week, when we get to a place of that state of consciousness, of that mindset where I'm so powerfully with Hashem in my consciousness that even in Atzara, I know that Hashem is with me.
Speaker A:I know he's there with me, and I'm ready to say thank you in that place where I'm constantly Walking with Hashem.
Speaker A:So in that place, there's a revelation of Emma, a revelation of truth.
Speaker A:Truth is revealed.
Speaker A:And then it illuminates my speech.
Speaker A:And we spoke about.
Speaker A:Maybe it's, you know, like I always like to say whatever I'm saying over here is the way I'm understanding Ibn Akman.
Speaker A:Not necessarily.
Speaker A:That's exactly what it is.
Speaker A:That's my understanding.
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker A:But my understanding is that having debur of MS, speech of truth is something that expresses itself through us in a way of stability.
Speaker A:Just.
Speaker A:Just like the word Ms.
Speaker A:We said has all strong legs.
Speaker A:And the word sheker for falsehood is teetering all the time, right?
Speaker A:So just like, just like that, a person who has ms, our speech is.
Speaker A:With ms, our speech is strong and stable and confident.
Speaker A:And we're always able to say we're never worried that we have to make something up.
Speaker A:Why?
Speaker A:Because it's secure.
Speaker A:It's powerful and strong.
Speaker A:Because I'm always on point.
Speaker A:I'm never trying to cover up.
Speaker A:No stories, no games, no cover ups, right?
Speaker A:Just truth.
Speaker A:And so then we began to talk about how this pattern of speech comes out in four different ways, which Rabbi Nachman calls the ribua hadibur, the four aspects of speech, and which he also calls the Arba Chelke adibur, the four, four aspects of speech.
Speaker A:Ribua.
Speaker A:Speech really means.
Speaker A:Ribua means square, right?
Speaker A:Not sure exactly what that means yet.
Speaker A:We have a few ideas.
Speaker A:But one of the aspects is, is that it represents that they're not like four different things.
Speaker A:They're all part of one thing.
Speaker A:In other words, to have really.
Speaker A:To live in a state of really high level truth and high level speech.
Speaker A:Because of that, it's, it's.
Speaker A:They're all one square.
Speaker A:It's not.
Speaker A:There's four different sections.
Speaker A:It's in the box, all in one box.
Speaker A:Vera always knows what to say.
Speaker A:All in one box.
Speaker A:All in one box, right?
Speaker A:So another thing that has to be said just as we're going here though, is that there's a reason why this happens, right?
Speaker A:And that is because this is very sweet.
Speaker A:This is cool.
Speaker A:This is because we're talking about a process that, that leads to a birth.
Speaker A:The first place we understand this process is with the actual birth, right?
Speaker A:And so the woman is in Sar and from that place she's ready to thank Hashem.
Speaker A:And then through that, everything goes where it's supposed to.
Speaker A:The blood goes to the place it's supposed to go and pushes out the baby.
Speaker A:And in the end, there's a laida there's a birth of the baby, right?
Speaker A:And conceptually that means for us, that for the lady, that's just the way it is for us.
Speaker A:It means that when we are in a tsar, we're in a tribulation.
Speaker A:And in that place, we thank Hashem for the past.
Speaker A:We remember Hashem always took care of me.
Speaker A:Thank you for everything you did for me.
Speaker A:Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Speaker A:And then we thank Hashem for where we are right now.
Speaker A:And.
Speaker A:And then we get out from there.
Speaker A:We also have a Lada, a Lada, a birth of das, of new consciousness, of Hashem, deeper, newer consciousness with Hashem, right?
Speaker A:This is the pattern.
Speaker A:And this pattern goes through this whole Torah, right?
Speaker A:So that's why in a certain sense, speech itself is like a birth, is like a laydah, right?
Speaker A:How do we see that?
Speaker A:Remember, we talked about this many times, but our speech in our mouth is called in the Svar makadoshim, Malchus peh, Right?
Speaker A:And why do we call it malchus peh once again, for the hundredth time, But I'm going to say it, keep saying it in every shir we ever do, maybe.
Speaker A:Why is it called malchus peh?
Speaker A:Why is it malchus?
Speaker A:So malchus means kingdom or kingship.
Speaker A:And the kingdom is the place of revealing the will of the king.
Speaker A:It's the place of revelation.
Speaker A:And you know, just like a king would go out and stand up, you know, they still do this nowadays in England, right?
Speaker A:When they have to do something, I don't know what they do nowadays, but they come out to the balcony in front of the big square, wherever it is, and all the people, the whole amun.
Speaker A:Am is out there, and they stand up there, and that's where they deliver addresses, right, to the whole nation.
Speaker A:So, and that is what are they doing?
Speaker A:They're revealing what is the will of the.
Speaker A:Of the melech.
Speaker A:What's the will of the king or the queen, whatever it is, in.
Speaker A:In.
Speaker A:In the.
Speaker A:In the Malchus, in the kingdom.
Speaker A:So it's the revealing of the will, desire, consciousness, intellect of the king within the kingdom.
Speaker A:And so this is really actually what speech is.
Speaker A:We maybe touched on this last time, I think, right?
Speaker A:This is what speech is.
Speaker A:Speech is the thing that reveals what's on the inside of my brain, right?
Speaker A:It reveals what's on the inside.
Speaker A:So what does that mean really?
Speaker A:In a certain sense, speech itself is a birthday is a lada.
Speaker A:What does a birth mean?
Speaker A:What does a layda mean?
Speaker A:A birth or a leda is something coming out, being Revealed, that was hidden up until that point.
Speaker A:So.
Speaker A:And the word that Rabbi Nachman uses in this place is that when we reach this level, through gratitude and praise and das and halacha and through, through, through that, then he says, truth is revealed.
Speaker A:What's nisgala?
Speaker A:What does it mean?
Speaker A:Something's revealed.
Speaker A:It means it's something that's there, but it.
Speaker A:That has to come from being in a hidden place, out into the revealed realm, right?
Speaker A:This is called birth.
Speaker A:This is a birth.
Speaker A:So it's not an accident that it flows this way, that through working on ourselves, through the Midah of Haida of gratitude, thankfulness, through working on being makir and yideya hashem, knowing and recognizing, being close to hashem, then we achieve a birth, a birth of new das.
Speaker A:So it makes perfect sense that part of that birth is going to be.
Speaker A:The birth is going to be reflected in our speech, because our speech itself is a birth.
Speaker A:It's a laydah.
Speaker A:It's a birth of something that's hidden inside.
Speaker A:And then it gets revealed into the world.
Speaker A:This is what speech is, by the way, as a side point.
Speaker A:It's.
Speaker A:It's a little bit striking, maybe, but we should all take to heart that when something comes out of our mouths, right, It.
Speaker A:It's.
Speaker A:It's real.
Speaker A:It's.
Speaker A:It's.
Speaker A:It's us.
Speaker A:It's reflecting on us, right?
Speaker A:And when we say things and, and they come up sometimes, I don't know if this ever happens to you guys, but you say things and they come out of your mouth, and then right away you could be like, oh my gosh.
Speaker A:What did I just say?
Speaker A:What did I just say?
Speaker A:Someone's raising their hand in here.
Speaker A:I won't say who it is, but.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:So we have to know, though, and this is.
Speaker A:I don't mean to.
Speaker A:To put it into.
Speaker A:To the person to raise their hand too much, but.
Speaker A:But when that thing comes out, it's coming from somewhere.
Speaker A:It's a reflection of what's on the inside.
Speaker A:It's really revealing something about us.
Speaker A:So, you know, not that the goal of having a good, good speech, not that the goal of not saying lashon hara, right, or not demeaning people or whatever, whatever it is, is that it shouldn't look bad on me, right?
Speaker A:But I should recognize.
Speaker A:And it's more of a reason to be careful because, you know, another aspect is.
Speaker A:I know I'm rambling a bit here, but it's an important point.
Speaker A:Malchus works in two ways, right?
Speaker A:It's on the one hand It's a revelation of what's inside.
Speaker A:But on the other hand, it can also have an impact when we reveal something that maybe we're not really there yet, but we put something into the realm of malchus because we want to be there.
Speaker A:We want to get to that level.
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker A:So it happens in a few ways.
Speaker A:The.
Speaker A:One of the first ways is this way of speech, right?
Speaker A:So you can begin to.
Speaker A:Let's say you were not born as a religious jew and you came from a secular society.
Speaker A:And it always strikes me when I hear people that I know and they curse words that fly out of their mouth.
Speaker A:I can't believe it.
Speaker A:I always shocked to hear such a thing.
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker A:But it happens.
Speaker A:This stuff comes out, right?
Speaker A:So maybe I want to say, you know what?
Speaker A:I still.
Speaker A:It's still within me, the desire to use those words.
Speaker A:But you know what?
Speaker A:I'm making a rule for myself, and I'm gonna define that.
Speaker A:My speech is not going to be like that anymore.
Speaker A:So.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:And, you know, your.
Speaker A:Your friends might look at you and say, why are you talking like this?
Speaker A:Where's my old friend who used to say this and that?
Speaker A:I'm not even gonna start this and that.
Speaker A:And, you know, come on, come on, it's us.
Speaker A:We're out.
Speaker A:Let's, you know, what happened to you?
Speaker A:And you're thinking to yourself, you're right, I'm not that person.
Speaker A:I still have those things inside me.
Speaker A:But by using it in this realm of malchus and speaking in a beautiful way, it can actually have an impact on you.
Speaker A:It can have an impact back.
Speaker A:So too, like we always say, the other aspect of malchus that we say is levosh malchus.
Speaker A:Like from megillah's Esther, Levosh malchus.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:The clothing of a person.
Speaker A:So there's one.
Speaker A:One aspect is I dress in a way that reveals really what's inside.
Speaker A:The way that I dress reveals what's on the inside.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:And it reveals something about me.
Speaker A:Why?
Speaker A:Because it's the thing that's out there.
Speaker A:It's the interface between me and the rest of the world.
Speaker A:It's the last place where I really reveal myself.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:That's what clothing is.
Speaker A:So on the one hand, it can be like that.
Speaker A:It can be a revelation of what's on the inside.
Speaker A:On the other hand, I can say, you know what?
Speaker A:I know that I'm still a person who has a lot of behaviors that are not pure, let's say, that are not lashem shemayim, that are not kadush, that are not holy.
Speaker A:And I know I'm still like that inside.
Speaker A:But you know what?
Speaker A:I want to dress in a way that's going to pull me up.
Speaker A:It's going to pull me up.
Speaker A:It's going to bring me into a higher space of kedusha, a higher space of holiness, a higher state of purity.
Speaker A:And so I'm gonna like, fake it till I make it a little bit first.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:This is an aspect of Malchus and an aspect of speech.
Speaker A:And that was a huge tangent based on the fact that we're talking about how speech is a birth, speech is a Lada.
Speaker A:And when we get to a certain level of.
Speaker A:Of consciousness, of Hashem and living truth, then automatically the birth that comes out of us is truth.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:And so as we said this, these Arba chelke dibur are four things that.
Speaker A:The way I like to see them is they're four places where it's particularly tempting to stumble with moving away from truth in our speech.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:And so we did last time.
Speaker A:I think we did the first one last time.
Speaker A:I remember correctly.
Speaker A:You guys with me.
Speaker A:I didn't.
Speaker A:I just walked in the door, got everything ready and sat down to.
Speaker A:To.
Speaker A:To give this year.
Speaker A:I didn't have time to see where we left off.
Speaker A:But I think.
Speaker A:I think that we started with the.
Speaker A:With the speech of Tzedakah.
Speaker A:And Yeah, we did.
Speaker A:And.
Speaker A:And that we only did that one.
Speaker A:So I think we'll move on to.
Speaker A:To the next three and we'll look at them now and see how we understand the first one of Tzedakah.
Speaker A:We mentioned how it's particularly easy.
Speaker A:It's a particular temptation to get out of having to give money.
Speaker A:If we're not in a place where we understand the importance of giving money of Tzedakah or giving of whatever it is.
Speaker A:So we might lie and say, oh, sorry, I don't have.
Speaker A:When I really do have.
Speaker A:Or we might not answer the door if someone comes.
Speaker A:We might see someone in the street and specifically try to avoid them and not talk to them because we know they want.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:There's many things you could do in the.
Speaker A:In.
Speaker A:In this realm.
Speaker A:So.
Speaker A:But if you're a person of.
Speaker A:Of.
Speaker A:Of.
Speaker A:Of truth and you're a person of who.
Speaker A:Of Hashem consciousness.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:God consciousness, then you know it's not going to be.
Speaker A:If you're able to give, you're going to give and you're going to talk to the person.
Speaker A:That's how it's going to go.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:So that was going on the first speech, Moshe Rabbeinu made a speech that had a sentence that had four parts that's going on the first one.
Speaker A:So the second one.
Speaker A:Now we'll look at second speech form of speech, Ishuva.
Speaker A:There's speech of teshuvah.
Speaker A:Teshuva means what?
Speaker A:What's the translation of teshuva, guys?
Speaker A:Repaint, repent, return, return.
Speaker A:There it knows.
Speaker A:So I was hoping that someone would say the usual thing which is.
Speaker A:Which is teshuva is.
Speaker A:Is repentance, right?
Speaker A:Which.
Speaker A:Which.
Speaker A:I don't really know what it means, to be honest, but certainly has a negative connotation.
Speaker A:But teshuva is really returning, returning to really ourselves.
Speaker A:Returning to who we really are returning to our.
Speaker A:Our pure soul.
Speaker A:Returning to who we're supposed to be returning to Hashem.
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker A:That's what we're trying to do.
Speaker A:So, so we're on page, by the way.
Speaker A:We're on page in the BRI book, if anybody was following.
Speaker A:We're on page 122 at the very bottom.
Speaker A:So, yes, like the posse says in Hoshea, take with you words and return to hashem.
Speaker A:Take with you words and return to hashem.
Speaker A:It's a song, by the way.
Speaker A:It's a good song.
Speaker A:So, meaning what the pasik is telling us that when you're returning, when you're returning to Hashem, when you're doing chuva, there's an aspect that's required that it has to do with speech.
Speaker A:First of all, halacha, la maisa, we keep learning a little bit of halacha every week now in this one that we're talking about halacha, when you do chuva, what do you have to do?
Speaker A:What's the Rambam's prescribed method for chuva is I have to first stop doing the thing, obviously, right?
Speaker A:Then I have to do vidui.
Speaker A:That means I have to use my words, my speech, to confess to hashem.
Speaker A:What I did.
Speaker A:I have to utter.
Speaker A:I have to speak the words properly, right?
Speaker A:And then I have to.
Speaker A:I say sorry and I'm not doing it again.
Speaker A:That's the.
Speaker A:That's how we do chuva.
Speaker A:Stop doing it.
Speaker A:Confess and.
Speaker A:And say sorry and I'm not going to do it again.
Speaker A:That's chuva.
Speaker A:So a huge portion of this, right, is vidui, confession, and then of course, saying sorry to hashem.
Speaker A:But the vidui is the important one over here.
Speaker A:So let's.
Speaker A:Let's just hear a little bit, a little bit more of this and then we'll.
Speaker A:So, so he says, okay, no, it's gonna be awesome.
Speaker A:Hold on a second.
Speaker A:So how is this an Indian of emis, where.
Speaker A:I think this is my favorite one of the four.
Speaker A:Where do we see truth in Teshuva?
Speaker A:In the vidui of teshuva.
Speaker A:And it's connected to this whole entire Torah also, right?
Speaker A:Is that it's like this.
Speaker A:To do teshuvah means to confess to hashem.
Speaker A:And like we've said in other contexts, like with hispoitidus, if you're not doing it with absolute, complete truth, absolute authenticity, who are you trying to fool?
Speaker A:It's you and hashem.
Speaker A:That's it.
Speaker A:What are we doing?
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker A:Why would we lie in such a case?
Speaker A:Why would we not say the truth in such a case?
Speaker A:It's craziness.
Speaker A:It's insane, right?
Speaker A:So it's one of those times when I'm doing vidui, I'm confessing to hashem things that I've done wrong.
Speaker A:Sometimes it's hard for us to acknowledge that I really did it.
Speaker A:We like to tell stories about, oh, you know, I did this because of this.
Speaker A:I did this because this happened.
Speaker A:I did this because this happened.
Speaker A:You know, I could think of a few things, but I don't want to say them right now about stories about.
Speaker A:About these types of things.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:I know.
Speaker A:I'll tell you an example, plain example.
Speaker A:I know someone who got themselves involved in a.
Speaker A:In a scheme where they lost a ton of money.
Speaker A:And when I say a ton, these people are not wealthy at all.
Speaker A:And they lost, like, hundreds of thousands of dollars in this scheme.
Speaker A:And they got involved with it because they heard that maybe it's really okay, maybe it's not.
Speaker A:You know, it's one of these situations.
Speaker A:And.
Speaker A:And when I was speaking to them at first about this, and the person said to me was like, well, you know, like, maybe the community needs to address this because everything costs too much, Cost of living is too high, tuition is too high.
Speaker A:You know, maybe if we didn't have all these things, then people wouldn't be tempted to do this, right?
Speaker A:Because it's because of all these things.
Speaker A:That's why.
Speaker A:That's why we did it.
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker A:And it happens to be.
Speaker A:At that point, I said to this person, I was like, yeah, Sima says rational lies.
Speaker A:Absolutely.
Speaker A:I said to this person at the time, you know, let's just don't do that.
Speaker A:The first step is it's just to say, you made a huge mistake.
Speaker A:Just own it.
Speaker A:Doesn't matter what was going on.
Speaker A:I made a huge mistake.
Speaker A:I did something I shouldn't have done.
Speaker A:I.
Speaker A:I shouldn't have done it, but I did it.
Speaker A:I was stupid, right?
Speaker A:I did something that was risky and not smart.
Speaker A:I did it.
Speaker A:And now I have to.
Speaker A:I have to pick up the.
Speaker A:I have to pick up the pieces, right?
Speaker A:It's so tempting to not be truthful to ourselves because we have to admit to ourselves that there's something.
Speaker A:There's something wrong with me, right?
Speaker A:And to my surprise, like, you know, the way that we talk in our shurim and in our khevah, we all know that there's plenty wrong with us, right?
Speaker A:And that's okay.
Speaker A:Our whole.
Speaker A:Our whole drive in life, of course, that's why we're here, because there's something wrong with us.
Speaker A:And the rabbano shalom puts us here as a.
Speaker A:As an opportunity to make a tikkun.
Speaker A:That's why we're here, right?
Speaker A:So it's okay.
Speaker A:But sometimes on a deeper level, or for people who don't think necessarily the same way we do, it's terribly painful to acknowledge that there's something wrong with me, that I need to fix something, that something is broken within me that just.
Speaker A:I did things wrong that I'm responsible for.
Speaker A:Sometimes it's just too painful to say this, right?
Speaker A:Everybody loves the word narcissists these days, right?
Speaker A:This is the behavior of a narcissist who just.
Speaker A:Who will always blame everyone else.
Speaker A:Who will.
Speaker A:Another awesome modern word that everybody loves.
Speaker A:Who will gaslight other people into thinking that they're the problem, when really the necessity is to look inside and take responsibility for myself and to admit.
Speaker A:To admit to hashem, to admit to myself.
Speaker A:So do you see what I'm talking about?
Speaker A:There's a huge tendency in teshuvah, Even when it's just me talking to Hashem, and there should be no place for a lie, there's still a huge tendency.
Speaker A:Why?
Speaker A:Because I can't handle it myself.
Speaker A:I can't give it up myself.
Speaker A:So with amuna and emis, when we go through this pattern and we get to this place where we're in hashem, consciousness, God consciousness, now I'm in a space where I can take this responsibility and I can say it.
Speaker A:I can say, oh, I'm wrong.
Speaker A:I did something wrong.
Speaker A:I'm sorry, Hashem.
Speaker A:I'm sorry.
Speaker A:I did something wrong, right?
Speaker A:So I think this is something.
Speaker A:And then, you know, also, I don't have to be afraid of it, because if I have the consciousness of Hashem, we're going to see the next Part, right?
Speaker A:What.
Speaker A:What does God consciousness mean?
Speaker A:It means I'm living with God all the time and every moment.
Speaker A:So what would I be worried about if I.
Speaker A:If I.
Speaker A:If.
Speaker A:If.
Speaker A:If I confessed, if I.
Speaker A:If I admitted there's something wrong with me?
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:What am I worried about?
Speaker A:Maybe one.
Speaker A:One of the things I'm worried about is that.
Speaker A:Is that it's defining me, and that's who I am, right?
Speaker A:I have to.
Speaker A:If I acknowledge that this, is that I did this, then I have him saying, that's me, that's who I am.
Speaker A:And maybe I can't.
Speaker A:I don't want to live with myself.
Speaker A:I don't want to continue to be that person.
Speaker A:So if we live with Hashem, if we have God consciousness, if we went through this whole process that this Torah prescribes, and now through my constant thanking Hashem for the past, thanking Hashem for the present, thanking Hashem for difficulties and developing das God consciousness connection, right?
Speaker A:Reliance on Hashem developing all this, I get to such a space where I'm ready to.
Speaker A:Now I know Hashem told me, if you do chuva, and sincerely, you do chuva sincerely, then it's gone, it's in the past, it's fixed.
Speaker A:Forget it, forget it.
Speaker A:It's fixed.
Speaker A:Not only that, if I do chuva meawa, which we're not going to talk about exactly what that means right now, but chuva out of love, right?
Speaker A:Not only that, but it turns into a mitzvah.
Speaker A:My averas turn into a mitzvah, meaning that it doesn't define me.
Speaker A:It doesn't define me.
Speaker A:I get past it.
Speaker A:It's in the past.
Speaker A:So what does the posse say?
Speaker A:The next thing here, it's the top of page 124 in the BRI one, by the way.
Speaker A:So Mishrabbeinu's sentence had four sections to it.
Speaker A:He said, I'm not a man of words.
Speaker A:I'm not a man of words.
Speaker A:Not from yesterday, not from the day before, and not from when you first spoke to me.
Speaker A:Those represent the four aspects of speech, right?
Speaker A:This one is the one that goes on, not yesterday.
Speaker A:What does not yesterday mean?
Speaker A:Rabbi Nachman says, not yesterday is the words of Chuva.
Speaker A:Like the apostate says in Tehillim va toyemer shuvu b'nayadam.
Speaker A:And say, return, children of man.
Speaker A:Return people.
Speaker A:Because a thousand years in your eyes, Hashem is one.
Speaker A:Is one yesterday.
Speaker A:A thousand years in your eyes, Hashem is.
Speaker A:Is one yesterday.
Speaker A:What does that mean?
Speaker A:It means.
Speaker A:It means, oh, it's so Beautiful.
Speaker A:It means you're carrying your averas, you're carrying your sins, you're carrying all the bad behaviors and all the embarrassing things that you did.
Speaker A:You're carrying them on your back like a tremendous, heavy burden.
Speaker A:It feels like you're carrying a thousand years on you.
Speaker A:I'm carrying a thousand years on my back, right?
Speaker A:But Chuva says Hashem, says Shuva B'nay, Adam, return to me, people.
Speaker A:Because you know why?
Speaker A:Because those thousand years in my eyes says Hashem, it's yesterday.
Speaker A:It's one yesterday, it's gone.
Speaker A:It's in the past.
Speaker A:You did Chuva, to me sincerely, you returned to Hashem when with sincerity and truth.
Speaker A:That's the past.
Speaker A:It's time to move forward.
Speaker A:But you can only do that in this state where you're with Hashem, you trust Hashem, you're connected to Hashem, you're thinking right?
Speaker A:And your words are true.
Speaker A:Full responsibility.
Speaker A:Because so long as we're making up stories about what happened, we're making up stories about what we did, it's not real.
Speaker A:So we can't let go of doesn't fall into this, right?
Speaker A:The power of being truthful about my own teshuvah, my own behavior, my own shortcomings, has the power to actually redeem us from them.
Speaker A:But so long as we don't have the truth, we're not going to be redeemed from them.
Speaker A:We're going to be carrying them like a thousand years on our back.
Speaker A:That's it.
Speaker A:That's it.
Speaker A:Oh, that's a powerful one.
Speaker A:You hear, guys, you with me?
Speaker A:So that's the temptation.
Speaker A:But the reward for being a person who speaks truth like this is unbelievable.
Speaker A:It's unbelievable.
Speaker A:Okay, next.
Speaker A:So that's the first two Tzedakah teshuvah.
Speaker A:This third speech, the third form of speech is Vyesh dibur shel asherus is the speech of wealth of the wealthy, which is referring to the wealthy who are.
Speaker A:Who are close to the.
Speaker A:The king could be the king, Hashem, or could be the king.
Speaker A:Like the government, people of power.
Speaker A:Like, like.
Speaker A:Like it says in.
Speaker A:In the possession the three tendrils.
Speaker A:Tendrils.
Speaker A:So what is this referring to?
Speaker A:This is referring to when Yosef at Tzadik was in jail, right?
Speaker A:And so one of the.
Speaker A:One of the guys had a dream, and in the dream, there was a tree going with these.
Speaker A:With these three tendrils, right?
Speaker A:Was this Para's dream?
Speaker A:No, this was.
Speaker A:This was the dream of either the.
Speaker A:The.
Speaker A:The baker, the cup bearer, or the Baker, those are the two guys, right?
Speaker A:One of their dreams had, had the, this vine growing with the 3, 3 tendrils.
Speaker A:Tendrils on a vine are the things that wrap around to hold it up.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:It's interesting that it's talking about the place of Yosef at Tzadik, but that's another, another discussion.
Speaker A:But the Gemara, Darshanism, Vidarsha, Ravar, Sin is a levracha.
Speaker A:The Gemara Echulen, Shlosha, Sare, Gayim.
Speaker A:These are the three kind of noble, noble, noble Jews.
Speaker A:Three noble Jews who are.
Speaker A:They're wealthy and they're close to the king.
Speaker A:So the Gemara is talking about over there that there's.
Speaker A:You could take it however you want.
Speaker A:This is, by the way, this is real food for anti Semites, just so you know.
Speaker A:But the Gemara says that we have three Jews who are noble people who are in places of power that are able to help the Jewish people from those places of power.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:So on the, on the one side it could be, could be like normal, wealthy, powerful Jews, but they have noble people who do good things and take care of the Jewish people from wherever, however they're connected.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:That's the stuff that anti Semites would love to hear.
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker A:But they're noble.
Speaker A:That's the, that's the, that's the thing.
Speaker A:They're not conniving.
Speaker A:They're not.
Speaker A:They're noble people.
Speaker A:They could be also Tzadikim who are close to Hashem, who can do like this.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:But what's their power?
Speaker A:They're Ashim koim al Mahchus.
Speaker A:They have an aspect of speech, an aspect of Deborah.
Speaker A:Let's hold it there for a second.
Speaker A:And in those places of power, they have a very powerful speech.
Speaker A:And that speech can get things done, can make Yeshua happen.
Speaker A:So happens to be that we saw this Rabnoson brings this down in the Kuti Alokhas that you see what happened over here by Yosef at Tzadik.
Speaker A:He is in jail.
Speaker A:How did he get out of jail?
Speaker A:What took him out of jail?
Speaker A:It was actually these types of people who were close to the king.
Speaker A:He happened to be in jail together with the baker and the cup bearer of the king of the free world of Para, right?
Speaker A:And he said to them, he made a connection with them.
Speaker A:And it's through those two guys who were Kruvim the Malchus that he was taken out of jail.
Speaker A:And if you remember the four types of pain that we go through, the categories of pain that we go through that we talked about before in the Arbeitzrik in Lahaidois, in the four that give thanks, one of them was a person in jail.
Speaker A:The person who's in jail, who has no hope, was trapped, who doesn't know how they're going to get out, right?
Speaker A:They are the Arbitruchan Loidis, that's one of the Arbitruchan Laudais.
Speaker A:And we're seeing over here that the Karaivim Lamalchos, those people can get that person out.
Speaker A:Okay?
Speaker A:Like the Posseq says, which means in his speech is gracious and he has the king for his companion.
Speaker A:So he has khain in his speech.
Speaker A:He has a beautiful type of speech and he's close to the king.
Speaker A:This is the speech of those who are close to the king.
Speaker A:And this connects to the third aspect of Moishe Rabbeinu's sentence, which was also from two days ago.
Speaker A:Two days ago means today, yesterday and the day before.
Speaker A:That's why the world is shilshoim.
Speaker A:It has the word Shalosh in it.
Speaker A:Three, right?
Speaker A:So gam me shilshom is referring to this Shlesha Sarigim.
Speaker A:These three aspects of being, of being, of having a powerful debur and being close to the king for themselves.
Speaker A:This is the speech of those who are close to the king.
Speaker A:So we hear the shadow over here.
Speaker A:What is it?
Speaker A:Where do I have speech in this realm that tempts me to not be truthful?
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:So I have a few thoughts.
Speaker A:So there's so many, so many obvious examples of this.
Speaker A:But when a person has power, right?
Speaker A:When a person has power and influence, what an obvious temptation to use that power and influence not for what I'm meant for, but for my own benefit, for my own welfare, right?
Speaker A:So I don't know how many things we can look at, like think about how many people have been, have been torn down for embezzlement in a company.
Speaker A:Oh, you're supposed to be in charge of the company and taking care of the whole company and building it, right?
Speaker A:And you embezzled money.
Speaker A:You took money out of it for yourself.
Speaker A:You're the guy who's up there with influence and power and that's what you're using it for, right?
Speaker A:Many, many, many, many aspects like this.
Speaker A:And so for us also, we can think about there's places where I have a certain aspect of power and influence.
Speaker A:Do I use that power and influence for.
Speaker A:For, for good?
Speaker A:Or do I use that power and influence in order to get what I want to get what's good for me.
Speaker A:They don't have to be separate things.
Speaker A:You can do good things for yourself also that are.
Speaker A:That are good for everybody.
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker A:But when do I use it like that?
Speaker A:When do I use my speech from a place of power and authority, as a.
Speaker A:An authoritarian, as an abuser, as a user, as a controller, instead of using it for tikkunim, for building, for building people up, for beauty.
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker A:How many times have we said this one?
Speaker A:Another one of our sound bites that we always say, with your speech, you can choose to build a person up, build them up and lift them up, or with your speech, you can tear them down and destroy them all with speech.
Speaker A:Right, so this is an aspect, I think, that we see of the.
Speaker A:Of the.
Speaker A:Of the.
Speaker A:Of the Khus.
Speaker A:You hear?
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:And it's a temptation.
Speaker A:It's a.
Speaker A:It's a serious temptation.
Speaker A:Okay, Fourth, one last.
Speaker A:One last one is there is such a thing as the speech of Malchus.
Speaker A:Malchus means.
Speaker A:Means kingdom, obviously.
Speaker A:King, kingship, like we always say, which is an aspect of malchus pe.
Speaker A:The Malchus, the kingdom of the mouth.
Speaker A:This is an aspect of the last.
Speaker A:The last thing that Moshe Rabbeinu said, which was even from then when I spoke to you, Meaz.
Speaker A:So he's connecting it to the pasak that says your throne was standing strong from back then, meaning connecting the ma'az of our posse over here to the Meaz of the throne of Hashem, the kingdom, kingship.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:So in that sense we have.
Speaker A:That's the connection.
Speaker A:But what is the.
Speaker A:What is this speech to us?
Speaker A:What is it referring to?
Speaker A:How does it make sense?
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:So one of the aspects is over here, like we were saying before, the aspect of speech itself, just the power of speech alone we spoke about this last time, is that it reveals what's inside and what's coming out.
Speaker A:It is a true carbon copy of what's inside my head.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:And what do I mean by that?
Speaker A:So he says this is referring.
Speaker A:This.
Speaker A:This is referring to.
Speaker A:Ramosan says this is referring to the Deepur itself.
Speaker A:Just the power of speech on its own.
Speaker A:The concept of speech is an aspect of truth.
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker A:Because even.
Speaker A:Even if I want to say something that.
Speaker A:That.
Speaker A:That I know is not true, speech is.
Speaker A:Is taking exactly what's in my mind and making a pure, truthful copy of what's in my mind and sending it out, whatever I choose to say.
Speaker A:The nature of speech is that it has to be, no matter what, try to say something that's not in your mind.
Speaker A:It's not possible.
Speaker A:It's not possible.
Speaker A:And also, you can't say something and have something else in your mind.
Speaker A:It doesn't work, right?
Speaker A:Famous statement of Rabbi Nachman that he says, right?
Speaker A:You can.
Speaker A:It's impossible to have two thoughts in your mind at once, right?
Speaker A:So when you have bad thoughts, think of a good thought, choose a good thought and go with it.
Speaker A:Because the whole time you're thinking that you can't be in a bad place.
Speaker A:It's not easy to hold it there sometimes.
Speaker A:And you can get pulled back into a bad place, right?
Speaker A:But in the same way, you can't, your.
Speaker A:Your mouth is saying what's, What's.
Speaker A:What's in your mind.
Speaker A:You can't.
Speaker A:You can't play games like this.
Speaker A:It doesn't work, Right?
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:That's what speech is.
Speaker A:So speech itself is a revelation of truth, the truth of what's inside my head.
Speaker A:So this whole concept of speech, right, that we're talking about is this Inyan, that, that, that, that, and.
Speaker A:And there's two ways to look at it so beautifully.
Speaker A:Do you remember how at the beginning today, when we were tangenting a little bit, how he said that the power of malchus is that it reveals what's on the inside.
Speaker A:But at the same time, I can put something out there in the malchus that I want to reach towards, that will draw me towards it, that will affect me, that will bring me up, even if it's not exactly where I am right now.
Speaker A:That's the power of malchus, right?
Speaker A:So too now, in this whole thing, we're talking about speech, this whole thing, the Torah that Rabbi Nachman gave us over here is that it flows so beautifully from all of the pathway of thankfulness, gratitude, and of the past, and then thankfulness and gratitude of the present, even when the present is a sorrow and a tribulation, thanking Hashem, even there and then that takes me to a place of things going back to where the way they're supposed to be, where now I'm in a state of Lahal, of praising Hashem completely.
Speaker A:And then I get into a state of Das, of total God, consciousness and connection, right through this whole pathway.
Speaker A:It's such an awesome pathway to go on.
Speaker A:Such an awesome pathway to go on.
Speaker A:So.
Speaker A:So from that place, right?
Speaker A:When I get into that state now, Imir Tashem, I'm living such a existence of truth that my speech will flow in this way.
Speaker A:And all these four things, four aspects of speech will be in.
Speaker A:Will be in this way will just be true because I'm going to be a God conscious, true, authentic person.
Speaker A:No stories, no games, no cover ups.
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker A:But on the other hand, if I'm not there yet, you know, what do we always say?
Speaker A:By the way, if you look in the, in the English version of these pamphlets that we, that we have from the, in Israel, so they published.
Speaker A:And here the, the, the introduction and method that we wrote here in Bresla of Thornhill, right.
Speaker A:Is published in this book from Eretz Yisrael.
Speaker A:So you know, guys, we're part of something very special here that you see this, it has, this is by us.
Speaker A:This is from right here.
Speaker A:From this house where we learn came this, this, that's published with the Tayal Betarossa and Eretz Yisrael.
Speaker A:Beautiful.
Speaker A:But it has in here the 18 principles of how to learn Lakutimuran.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:And principle number four, Claudal, is this principle that I always like to say, I've been saying in every class so far that we cannot understand Rabbi Nachman's Torahs if we don't live the advice that he's giving.
Speaker A:We'll get it a little bit, but if you really want to internalize it, then we have to live the advice of Rabbi Nachman.
Speaker A:So this advice over here of true speech, I'm saying it, he doesn't say it exactly like this.
Speaker A:Once again, this is my understanding, my take on it, but living in a way and trying to make our speech dibur avemes, speech of truth, even if it's not flowing naturally, even if I'm not there yet, but working towards that is the nature of malchus and of malchus that the malchus reveals, but it also has an effect that builds up the next level.
Speaker A:So when we choose to change our speech and to speak in a proper way, to only be people of truth, no stories, no games, no cover ups, right?
Speaker A:That is going to have an effect on us.
Speaker A:And that's going to bring us up and turn us into people of authenticity and help us to live in the realms that this Torah is talking about.
Speaker A:Our speech should be a birth of das, of consciousness, of hashem.
Speaker A:And our speech should be something that lifts us up into the realm of truth and takes us to these places.
Speaker A:Just to wrap it up, the last, the last point over here.
Speaker A:And of course, one of the reasons why malchus works in these two ways is because malchus is synonymous with the sphere of kesser.
Speaker A:The malchus, when you're going down kesser, is the highest sphere.
Speaker A:And malchus is the lowest sphere.
Speaker A:But when these universes are traversed, there's a place where the Malchus of the level above is the Kesser of the level below Malchus.
Speaker A:Malchus is Malchus.
Speaker A:And Malchus is sometimes Kesser.
Speaker A:Which is of course why Malchus is the kingdom and Kesser is the crown.
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker A:They're intrinsically connected.
Speaker A:This is why Malchus can either be that place where something's revealed or it can be where it's the lowest level, where everything above is revealed.
Speaker A:Or it can be the highest level that affects everything below it.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:This is the power.
Speaker A:This is the power of Malchus.
Speaker A:And speech itself is Malchus.
Speaker A:Malchus.
Speaker A:So we should take all of this stuff.
Speaker A:I know this is a hard Torah and things are not as clear as sometimes as they have been always in the past.
Speaker A:But let's grab a hold of this this week.
Speaker A:Let's make this week a week of truth.
Speaker A:Mirt hashem with our speech.
